Fall semester: DONE. -sigh 0f relief- Talk about one heck of a semester. =) I love everything I do (kind of..), but the worst part about being psycho-busy all the time is the toll it takes on my spiritual life. Towards the end of this semester, I feel like I crashed & burned. This is the second semester in a row to have this happen. This semester wasn’t as bad as last, but it still had its moments.
I was talking with Reebok a few weeks ago about a book by John & Stasi Eldridge titled, “Captivating.” I bought this book when I was about 13 years old, read about 30-40 pages into it and put it on the shelf and hadn’t touched it since. At the ripe age of 13, I’d labeled it as one of those “stupid, ‘princessy’ books all about the heart & other dumb stuff.” That’s probably close to a word-for-word description of how I has summed up this book. Reebok informed me that I HAD to go back and give it another shot. I believe she said it changed her life. =P Well, I wasn’t exactly Miss Positivity about giving the book another shot…
Last night I was wrestling with God a little bit about some issues I’ve been struggling with pretty heavily, and I got to a point where I had to come to grips with why I was doing what I was doing. It was an issue of the heart. As I was getting ready to go to bed, I remembered my deal with Reebok – read the book over break. I only read the introduction and first chapter last night, but HOLY COW. The reason it didn’t make a whole lotta sense back in 7th grade was because of my spiritual and emotional immaturity, and.. well, rebellion. I wanted nothing to do with the typical female “stuff” when it came to love & all that crap (as I would have referred to it). But reading through it now.. WOW! It’s so true! As corny as it sounds and as much as I hate to admit it, everything I’ve read so far is dead-on. The books talks about the deepest desires of a woman’s heart, the depth in God’s creation of woman, etc etc, you get it. Not really a “Hannah” kinda book. The first chapter talked about how sometimes addictions form because of a lack of “need” being met in a woman’s heart, and how a lot of times women think they’re being weak or vulnerable when they realize that and want that changed. Okay, okay.. I’m done trying to cover that one up. It’s true. I’m not sure why I find sensitivity to be so… bad, but I really do a lot of times! I’m expecting great things from this book, nonetheless.
Pray on, friends. Pray on.